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Bear V. Shark: The Novel


Bear V. Shark: The Novel

In Chris Bachelder's witty and scathing first novel BEAR V. SHARK,
there is a small chapter about old televisions and, specifically,
remotes, clickers. He writes, "The clicker, Roger, is a thing of
the past, just like the waffle iron and the novel." I wonder if
Bachelder believes it, because his novel is not your normal
narrative, Bachelder not your normal novelist. Bachelder, an Alumni
Graduate Fellow in the MFA program at the University of Florida,
must have watched oodles of television and read reams of tabloids
before and during his writing of his comic novel.

The story is this: "Given a relatively level playing field ---
i.e., water deep enough so that a Shark could maneuver
proficiently, but shallow enough so that a Bear could stand and
operate with its characteristic dexterity --- who would win a fight
between a Bear and a Shark?" That is the media spectacle. That is
what the world wants to know. The upcoming rematch (the Bear lost
in Bear V. Shark I) and everything that attaches itself to the
periphery of this spectacle --- like the Normans for instance ---
that is what is on every television set, in every newspaper, in
every fast food kids meal.

With an essay entitled "Bear v. Shark: A Reason to Live," young
Curtis Norman wins a national writing contest and four tickets to
the event (something to die for), and his family is traveling to
the sovereign nation of Las Vegas to partake in the event.
Everywhere they go there's some opinion on who will win. "Bear!"

The novel, written in quick bits, short commercials, segues,
vignettes, is sharp and fierce. How much information is too much
information? When does entertainment stop entertaining? How big can
a spectacle be before it begins to deflate? Why do we care so much
about the most insignificant happenings in the world? Does it make
our day that much better knowing that Bea Arthur is trying to get
on another sitcom? Are we better people after watching "E!"? Are we
more whole knowing that The Rock is going to get his revenge in the
WWF ring? Sylvester Stallone. Halle Barry. Whitney Houston. Gary
Coleman. Justine Bateman. Gary Busey. William Shatner. Do their
personal lives really matter to us? Why do we care? When did it get
like this, where our world is one gigantic billboard, one big
message selling us something, showing us pretty pictures or
something titillating while we eat our morning scones?

That's what Bachelder does for us --- holds up a mirror, and all
the garishness comes smack back in our faces.

Reviewed by Jonathan Shipley on January 21, 2011

Bear V. Shark: The Novel
by Chris Bachelder

  • Publication Date: October 23, 2001
  • Genres: Fiction
  • Hardcover: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Scribner
  • ISBN-10: 0743219465
  • ISBN-13: 9780743219464