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"What
boys need, first and foremost, is to be seen through a different
lens than tradition prescribes. Individually, and as a culture,
we must discard the distorted view of boys that ignores or denies
their capacity for feeling, the view that colors even boys' perceptions
of themselves as above or outside a life of emotions."
RAISING CAIN was written in response to two primary questions: "What
do boys need to become emotionally whole men? What is the cost to
boys of a culture that suppresses their emotional life in service
to rigid ideals of manhood?"
Accepting the biological differences between boys and girls when
considering their development (although those differences are an
uncertainty), the authors believe the differences are amplified
by a culture that holds boys to stereotypical ideals. One that provides
"emotional literacy" for girls, but not for boys; discounts their
intuitive emotions; and creates a counterproductive environment.
Through the sharing of poignant anecdotes and recounting of their
own experiences with boys, Kindlon and Thompson offer the chance
to understand and empathize with boys' struggles.
RAISING CAIN presents an exceptionally clear picture of boys from
early childhood through adolescence --- from developmental changes
and corresponding relationships to the consequences of popular culture
and painful incidents of cruelty. The concluding chapter is important
enough to be read more than once, and taken to heart, by parents,
teachers, mentors, or anyone who spends time with a young boy. There
the authors outline seven steps to "transform the way you nurture
and protect the emotional life of the boy in your life." They are
respectful, insightful, and fundamentally important.Ý
--- Annamarie Knapp
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