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1960At
the Age of twenty-nine, the Reverend Theophilus Henry Simmons had
developed one unshakable conviction about God—that He loved
women. If He didn't love women, how could He have created such a
magnificent creature as a fine, deep, dark chocolate woman who
looked real good in pinks and oranges, had big, sexy legs, and a
stardust twinkle in her smile—the kind of exquisite Negro
woman who compelled the Universe to praise every swing of her
large, shapely hips?But
there was a time during his senior year at Blackwell College,
before he entered The Interdenominational Theological Seminary in
Atlanta to study for the ministry, when he had mistaken God's love
of women as an excuse to become entangled with one Glodean Benson.
Being a young, single, good-looking Negro man, the kind many a
Negro woman wanted to make her own, he had constant opportunities
to get in trouble but managed to fight off that particular
temptation— until Glodean. Her brand of loving was
intoxicating but deadly, like cheap corn liquor that numbs your
brain before you have the sense to figure out it's no good for you.
Then when you finally let it go, its bitter aftertaste lingers,
along with the burning in your stomach and the aching in your
head.When
Theophilus finally told her, plain and simple, "I'm leaving you,
Glodean," she blinked back her tears, looked at him like he was
crazy, and smiled as she said: "You poor man—walking around
thinking I wanted you just for you. Just what is it you thought you
could offer me—unless and if you ever do become a
reverend—besides the seat in the front pew of your church
reserved for the First Lady?"Those words sliced through him right down to the bone, but she
wasn't through: "And now that you're off to the seminary, Mr.
Hope-to-Be-Reverend, believin' you're too high and mighty for Miss
Glodean, don't think I can be dismissed like some silly little
shouting churchwoman, shakin' all up in your face. I'm going to
stick to you, 'Re-ve-rend'—and some day, some way, I'm going
to get you ..."Theophilus couldn't imagine what she could do to him. But he
was already so ashamed of what he had done, it didn't matter. What
did matter were her words, which crushed him so until he thought he
heard his heart shatter from the impact of them on his
spirit.He
knew he was wrong to go with Glodean—"a gal with somethin' in
her drawers that snapped," as he once heard an old man say about
women like her. It was his curiosity about that "snappin' " that
caused him to put Glodean's feelings, his reputation, and his
relationship with God in jeopardy. He repented to God, and he knew
God had forgiven him—but it was the kind of mistake that he
never dreamed would dog him long after the affair ended. Glodean's
words and his sense of remorse haunted him, even in his sleep,
making him toss and turn, only to wake up tired and hurting in body
and soul. It was only the rigorous demands of his seminary
training, along with a lot of prayer and meditation on God's word,
that eased the disappointment he felt with himself. Then, to his
dismay, just before his final ordination, he heard that Glodean was
working in Atlanta, where she had family. She began turning up at
seminary social functions, and with no more than a look she
tormented him, filling him with fear and—he had to admit
it—a still—glowing spark of his old desire. He managed
to fend her off, but the war between his resentment at Glodean's
obsession over him and those sparks she could still ignite, was an
agony that made him feel like he was losing his mind.And
now, as graduation day approached, he had been assigned to take
over the pastorship of Greater Hope Gospel United Church in
Memphis, where Glodean and all of her family had gone for
years.Reverend Murcheson James, the pastor of Mount Nebo Gospel
United Church in Charleston, Mississippi, raced over to Atlanta
when Theophilus found out about his assignment and then got up
enough courage to place a desperate call to his friend and mentor,
asking for help with his dilemma. Rev. James knew Glodean's
family—her aunt, Willie Mae Clayton, owned a big—time
funeral home chain based in Memphis, with branches throughout the
South—and he couldn't even fathom how this boy had gotten
caught up with the likes of her. Where was the boy's good sense?
But the more Rev. James listened, the less sympathy he felt, and
the stronger his urge grew to whip Theophilus's tail until he
couldn't see straight.But
maybe Theophilus would learn a powerful lesson from all of this.
For some time, Rev. James had been feeling that Theophilus was a
little too comfortable with his flirtations with
women—conduct unacceptable for a godly man and especially one
who was becoming a minister. This time, Theophilus had gone farther
than he was sure the young preacher had ever gone before. Not that
he didn't understand the boy's needs, because he did. Happily
married himself to a wonderful woman, he couldn't imagine pastoring
without the love, support, and comfort of a good woman like his
wife, Susie. But to seek that kind of comfort outside of your
marriage was unacceptable. And as for marriage and Glodean Benson?
That went beyond unacceptable. It was a mess, plain and simple. To
make matters worse, it sounded like the fool still had the scent of
that heifer stuck in his nose. A man didn't need to have a woman's
scent branded in him like that, unless it was the right woman, a
woman who would stroke your heart, soothe your soul, comfort you,
and make you laugh. A woman who is your wife.Rev.
James figured it was time Theophilus learned that pas—toring
was serious business. A lot of young seminarians never did learn
that and they got blindsided by the temptations that came with the
job—liquor, money, politicking, women. Though he loved
Theophilus like a son, Rev. James decided not to spare the rod.
"Look here, Theophilus," he said. "You smart on most counts, but
you lost your doggone mind on this one. You are just a few months
shy of getting your final ordination papers, and look at
you—miserable, all tore up over what? It ain't God that has
you all upset. You know He done forgot about what you did as soon
as you told Him you were sorry. No, you tore up about a piece of
tail so lethal it ought to be a military weapon. Boy, if I was your
daddy, I'd knock you clean out your pastor's chair. 'Cause you know
better. I know you know better."Theophilus stared at the floor, having trouble looking Rev.
James in the eye. He certainly didn't have anything worth hearing
to say in his defense. He was searching his mind for words but Rev.
James wasn't looking for answers. "Now, before you start up, just
listen. Sometimes you need to be strong enough to stare evil down
in the face. You know why you are getting sent to Greater Hope? You
are going because Bishop Percy Jennings wants you there. Bishop
Jennings is being reassigned to the Tennessee/Mississippi District.
The Board of Bishops is doing some reshuffling after suspending
Bishop Otis Caruthers for approaching that little
seventeen-year-old girl."Just
thinking about it, Rev. James shook his head in disgust. "You
remember that mess, don't you? Little girl so young, she still had
milk and cookies on her breath."Theophilus nodded, wondering himself what would possess a grown
man to even think of looking at a little teenager. But men who
believed women were beneath them often didn't feel bound by the
rules of decency. Putting Bishop Otis Caruthers "on
location"—taking away his district—would keep him out
of commission for a while. But there was always a chance that a
corrupt bishop would bounce back. A few wads of bills placed in the
right palms, at the right time, and a bishop was back in power. It
wasn't so easy to get rid of a bishop in the Gospel United
Church."You
don't know this, son," Rev. James was saying, "but Percy Jennings
asked the Board of Bishops for special permission to take you with
him to his new district. Greater Hope is the only open ministry
there, and he personally assigned you the pastorship. He has been
watching you. He believes that young pastors like you, who are
godly men, who can preach the rafters out of the roof, and who can
understand what this new civil rights movement is bringing, are the
future of the Gospel United Church."Theophilus could not believe what he was hearing. Why would
Bishop Jennings take a personal interest in him? He started to ask,
but Rev. James held up his hand. "I'm not finished, Theophilus," he
said. "You are being tested. You are being tested because it needs
to be known if you can handle yourself right when in the fiery
furnace. Can you be like those three Hebrew boys, Shadrach,
Meshach, and Abednego, and trust that the Lord will stand with you
and guide you? Then will you be obedient to do what He tells you to
do? 'Cause that the kind of faith and commitment you gone need, not
only for pastoring Greater Hope but when you go even farther than
that. If you can't pass this test, you can't handle this call God
has on your life. Don't let your flesh lead you in another
direction. You hear me, Theophilus? Can you accept this
call?""Yes," said Theophilus. "I accepted God's call on my life a
long time ago—and yes, Rev. James. Yes, I will go to Greater
Hope."Now,
for the first time during the visit, Rev. James smiled."Glad you still got some gumption in you, boy," he
said."Scared me for a minute there. Thought that gal took all your
strength away, just like Delilah did that fool Sampson. Now, let's
pray."To
ease Theophilus's passage at Greater Hope, Rev. James appealed to
Mrs. Coral Thomas, his wife, Susie's, best friend and a longtime
deaconess of the church, to keep an eye on the young pastor. Many a
morning Theophilus would come to work and find Coral Thomas
bustling around his office, setting out a pot of delicious-smelling
coffee and a plate of fat ham biscuits, saying, "Sit down, Pastor,
and get yourself some breakfast. Made up these biscuits 'specially
for you."During his first year, Coral became his right hand. It was she
who encouraged him to make some much needed reassignments in the
church, giving jobs to the most qualified members instead of those
who gave the most money. There had been hurt feelings at first, but
now folks acknowledged that the choir had improved a hundredfold
and that the Usher Board, which visitors barely recognized before,
conducted their duty with a new pride. Now, instead of regular
church clothes, the men wore dark suits, white shirts, and blue
ties, while the women wore white shoes and white dresses with blue
lace handkerchiefs fixed to their shoulders with gold usher
pins.The
church was growing, with new members joining every week, attracted
by the new pastor's fiery preaching and his message of social
justice. But every Sunday, Theophilus scanned the faces of his
congregation with his heart pounding and sickness in his stomach,
ready to break out in a cold sweat, should he glimpse the pale pink
suit, pink lace gloves, and matching rose church hat that was the
signature ensemble of Glodean Benson.To
honor his first anniversary as pastor, Bishop Jennings and Rev.
James arranged for Theophilus to serve as the guest preacher for a
week-long revival that was being held at St. Paul's Gospel United
Church in Jackson, Mississippi. Usually more seasoned and
well-known pastors worked revivals, for it was a way to gain
visibility in the denomination. Theophilus recognized that choosing
him was an expression of confidence and faith, and he fervently
thanked God for granting him the strength to face the challenges of
that first year. Every morning before he started working, he got
down on his knees and prayed, saying, "Thank you, Lord. Thank you
for forgiving me, Lord, and keeping me strong and stead-fast. My
trust is in you, Lord. Thank you for walking with me each day,
lighting my path into the future you have set before
me."And
the Lord, ever mindful of the most pure, sincere, and heartfelt
desires of his children, now granted Theophilus a two-for-one
prayer miracle. The first miracle was blessing him so that he
preached with such power that it was as if he was trying to raise
the dead. And the second miracle dealt strictly with matters of the
heart.His
first revival sermon sent folks home feeling good about what God
had said to their hearts, thinking about what Theophilus had prayed
about, and looking over the scripture readings that accompanied his
text. But with each passing day, his sermons became hotter and
hotter, until on that last night, he walked up in the church so
full of spiritual fire he felt like he had what his mother said was
"fire all shut up in his bones." He had "gotten the spirit" before,
but he had never felt anything so consuming as the power of God in
that little church on that last night. All while he was preaching,
he couldn't keep still, couldn't stay put in the pulpit, and before
he knew it, he was taking one long-legged stride out from behind
the podium, shouting, "Thank you, Jesus," and running right into
the center aisle of the church.When
he ran into the aisle, folks started coming out of their seats,
waving their hands in the air, fanning fans and programs in his
direction, talking about, "Preach, boy, preach!" And when it was
clear that just about everybody in the sanctuary was becoming lit
up with the Holy Ghost, the organist hopped up from his seat and
began to play duum-duum, duum-duum—that
generic, deep—bass—sounding melody thatalways let
everyone at a highly charged Negro church service know it was time
to cut loose.When
the organist saw that folks were itching to shout, he started
playing louder and with more intensity, looking around to see which
one of the women would get the spirit first. But it was Theophilus,
and not one of the women, who took up the cause and got everybody
dancing and running through the aisles. And at that point, the
duum-duum, duum-duum turned into a fast-paced
duum-duum-duum-duum, duum-duum-duum-duum that set off a
chain reaction of shouting, dancing, and praising God that tore up
every pew in the sanctuary. When the congregation reached a peak
that couldn't be surpassed and Theophilus started experiencing a
climax of his own raging emotions, he looked over at the musicians
and signaled for them to calm the music down.At
that point he walked back into the pulpit and said breathlessly, "I
don't know about you but I'm sure glad that these musicians found
some time to steal away from Hallowed Ground Church of God and
Christ to play for us tonight. You know, church, I do believe that
God likes that music about as much as we do. Who ever said that the
Gospel United Church didn't know how to praise the
Lord?""I
don't know, Reverend!" the organist, a tall, thin, ebony-colored
man, shouted out. " 'Cause y'all is sho' havin' some church
tonight. The Holy Ghost ran by and touched every Saint in the
house. Praise the Lord!""Thank you, Brother Organist. And if you will, sir, I would ask
that you play 'At the cross, at the cross where I first saw the
light, and the burdens of my heart rolled away ...'"As
the organist started playing, Theophilus called the congregation to
join him in a circle of fellowship that went around the entire
sanctuary. Once the circle was in place, he said they needed to
come together to cement the spiritual bond they had formed over the
course of the revival week. And when everybody joined hands, he led
them in a prayer petitioning for forgiveness of past
transgressions—including his own— asked for healing of
their sorrows, and thanked God for stopping on by St. Paul's Gospel
United Church tonight, because they all knew He had His hands full
with all that was happening to Negroes in the South. Then he pulled
himself up off his knees, opened his arms in a symbolic embrace of
the congregation, and with the permission of St. Paul's pastor,
opened the doors of the church to everybody at the revival looking
for a church home.