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PROLOGUE
The bottle was dropped overboard on a warm summer evening, a few hours before the rain
began to fall. Like all bottles, it was fragile and would break if dropped a few feet from
the ground. But when sealed properly and sent to sea, as this one was, it became one of
the most seaworthy objects known to man. It could float safely through hurricanes or
tropical storms, it could bob atop the most dangerous of riptides. It was, in a way, the
ideal home for the message it carried inside, a message that had been sent to fulfill a
promise.
Like that of all bottles left to the whim of the oceans, its course was unpredictable.
Winds and currents play large roles in any bottle's direction; storms and debris may shift
its course as well. Occasionally a fishing net will snag a bottle and carry it a dozen
miles in the opposite direction in which it was headed The result is that two bottles
dropped simultaneously into the ocean might end up a continent apart, or even on opposite
sides of the globe. There is no way to predict where a bottle might travel, and that is
part of its mystery.
This mystery has intrigued people for as long as there have been bottles, and a few people
have tried to learn more about it. In 1929 a crew of German scientists set out to track
the journey of one particular bottle. It was set to sea in the South Indian Ocean with a
note inside asking the finder to record the location where it washed up and to throw it
back into the sea. By 1935 it had rounded the world and traveled approximately sixteen
thousand miles, the longest distance officially recorded.
Messages in bottles have been chronicled for centuries and include some of the most famous
names in history. Ben Franklin, for instance, used message-carrying bottles to compile a
basic knowledge of East Coast currents in the mid-1700s --- information that is still in
use to this day. Even now the U.S. Navy uses bottles to compile information on tides and
currents, and they are frequently used to track the direction of oil spills.
The most celebrated message ever sent concerned a young sailor in 1784, Chunosuke
Matsuyama, who was stranded on a coral reef, devoid of food and water after his boat was
shipwrecked. Before his death, he carved the account of what had happened on a piece of
wood, then sealed the message in a bottle. In 1935, 150 years after it had been set
afloat, it washed up in the small seaside village in Japan where Matsuyama had been born.
The bottle that had been dropped on a warm summer evening, however, did not contain a
message about a shipwreck, nor was it being used to chart the seas. But it did contain a
message that would change two people forever, two people who would otherwise never have
met, and for this reason it could be called a fated message. For six days it slowly
floated in a northeasterly direction, driven by winds from a high-pressure system hovering
above the Gulf of Mexico. On the seventh day the winds died, and the bottle steered itself
directly eastward, eventually finding its way to the Gulf Stream, where it then picked up
speed, traveling north at almost seventy miles per day.
Two and a half weeks after its launch, the bottle still followed the Gulf Stream. On the
seventeenth day, however, another storm --- this time over the mid-Atlantic --- brought
easterly winds strong enough to drive the bottle from the current, and the bottle began to
drift toward New England. Without the Gulf Stream forcing it along, the bottle slowed
again and it zigzagged in various directions near the Massachusetts shore for five days
until it was snagged in a fishing net by John Hanes. Hanes found the bottle surrounded by
a thousand flopping perch and tossed it aside while he examined his catch. As luck would
have it, the bottle didn't break, but it was promptly forgotten and remained near the bow
of the boat for the rest of the afternoon and early evening as the boat made its journey
back to Cape Cod Bay. At eight-thirty that night --- and once the boat was
safely inside the confines of the bay --- Hanes stumbled across the bottle again while
smoking a cigarette. Because the sun was dropping lower in the sky, he picked it up but
saw nothing unusual inside, and he tossed it overboard without a second glance, thereby
insuring that the bottle would wash up along one of the many small communities that lined
the bay.
It didn't happen right away, however. The bottle drifted back and forth for a few day ---
as if deciding where to go before choosing its course --- and it finally washed up along
the shore on a beach near Chatham.
And it was there after 26 days and 738 miles, that it ended its journey.
Back to top.
CHAPTER ONE
A cold December wind was blowing, and Theresa Osborne crossed her arms as she stared out
over the water. Earlier, when she'd arrived, there had been a few people walking along the
shore, but they'd taken note of the clouds and were long since gone. Now she found herself
alone on the beach, and she took in her surroundings. The ocean, reflecting the color of
the sky, looked like liquid iron, and waves rolled up steadily on the shore. Heavy clouds
were descending slowly, and the fog was beginning to thicken, making the horizon
invisible. In another place, in another time, she would have felt the majesty of the
beauty around her, but as she stood on the beach, she realized that she didn't feel
anything at all. In a way, she felt as if she weren't really here, as if the whole thing
was nothing but a dream.
She'd driven here this morning, though she scarcely remembered the trip at all. When she'd
made the decision to come, she'd planned to stay overnight. She'd made the arrangements
and had even looked forward to a quiet night away from Boston, but watching the ocean
swirl and churn made her realize that she didn't want to stay. She would drive home as
soon as she was finished, no matter how late it was.
When she was finally ready, Theresa slowly started to walk toward the water. Beneath her
arm she carried a bag that she had carefully packed that morning, making sure that she
hadn't forgotten anything. She hadn't told anyone what she carried with her, nor had she
told them what she'd intended to do today. Instead she'd said that she was going Christmas
shopping. It was the perfect excuse, and though she was sure that they would have
understood had she told them the truth, this trip was something she didn't want to share
with anyone. It had started with her alone, and that was the same way she wanted it to
end.
Theresa sighed and checked her watch. Soon it would be high tide, and it was then that she
would finally be ready. After finding a spot on a small dune that looked comfortable, she
sat in the sand and opened her bag. Searching through it, she found the envelope she
wanted. Taking a deep breath, she slowly lifted the seal.
In it were three letters, carefully folded, letters that she'd read more times than she
could count. Holding them in front of her, she sat on the sand and stared at them.
In the bag were other items as well, though she wasn't ready to look at those yet. Instead
she continued to focus on the letters. He'd used a fountain pen when he'd written them,
and there were smudges in various places where the pen had leaked. The stationery, with
its picture of a sailing ship in the upper right hand corner, was beginning to discolor in
places, fading slowly with the passage of time. She knew there would come a day when the
words would be impossible to read, but hopefully, after today, she wouldn't feel the need
to look at them so often.
When she finished, she slipped them back into the envelope as carefully as she'd removed
them. Then, after putting the envelope back into the bag, she looked at the beach again.
From where she was sitting, she could see the place where it had all started.
***
She'd been jogging at daybreak, she remembered, and she could picture that summer morning
clearly. It was the beginning of a beautiful day. As she took in the world around her, she
listened to the high-pitched squawking of terns and the gentle lapping of the waves as
they rolled up on the sand. Even though she was on vacation, she had risen early enough to
run so that she didn't have to watch where she was going. In a few hours the beach would
be packed with tourists lying on their towels in the hot New England sun, soaking up the
rays. Cape Cod was always crowded at that time of year, but most vacationers tended to
sleep a little later, and she enjoyed the sensation of jogging on the hard, smooth sand
left from the outgoing tide. Unlike the sidewalks back home, the sand seemed to give just
enough, and she knew her knees wouldn't ache as they sometimes did after running on
cemented pathways.
She had always liked to jog, a habit she had picked up from running cross-country and
track in high school. Though she wasn't competitive anymore and seldom timed her runs,
running was now one of the few times she could be alone with her thoughts. She considered
it to be a kind of meditation, which was why she liked to do it alone. She never could
understand why people liked to run in groups.
As much as she loved her son, she was glad Kevin wasn't with her. Every mother needs a
break sometimes, and she was looking forward to taking it easy while she was here. No
evening soccer games or swim meets, no MTV blaring in the background, no homework to help
with, no waking up in the middle of the night to comfort him when he got leg cramps. She
had taken to the airport three days ago to catch a plane to visit his father --- her ex
--- in California, and it was only after reminding him that Kevin realized he hadn't
hugged or kissed her good-bye yet. "Sorry, Mom," he said as he wrapped his arms
around her and kissed her. "Love you. Don't miss me too much, okay?" Then,
turning around, he handed the ticket to the flight attendant and almost skipped onto the
plane without looking back.
She didn't blame him for almost forgetting. At twelve he was in that awkward phase when he
thought that hugging and kissing his mom in public wasn't cool. Besides, his mind
was on other things. He had been looking forward to this trip since last Christmas. He and
his father were going to the Grand Canyon, then would spend a week rafting down the
Colorado River, and finally go on to Disneyland. It was every kid's fantasy trip, and she
was happy for him. Although he would be gone for six weeks, she knew it was good for Kevin
to spend time with his father.
She and David had been on relatively good terms since they'd divorced three years ago.
Although he wasn't the greatest husband, he was a good father to Kevin. He never missed
sending a birthday or Christmas gift, called weekly, and traveled across the country a few
times a year just to spend weekends with his son. Then, of course, there were the
court-mandated visits as well --- six weeks in the summer, every other Christmas, and
Easter break when school let out for a week. Annette, David's new wife, had her hands full
with the baby, but Kevin liked her a lot, and he had never returned home feeling angry or
neglected. In fact, he usually raved about his visits and how much fun he had. There were
times when she felt a twinge of jealousy at that, but she did her best to hide it from
Kevin.
Now, on the beach, she ran at a moderate clip. Deanna would be waiting for her to finish
her run before she started breakfast --- Brian would already be gone, she knew --- and
Theresa looked forward to visiting with her. They were an older couple --- both of them
were nearing sixty now --- but Deanna was the best friend she had.
The managing editor at the newspaper where Theresa worked, Deanna had been coming to the
Cape with her husband, Brian, for years. They always stayed in the same place, the Fisher
House, and when she found out that Kevin was leaving to visit his father in California for
a good portion of the summer, she insisted that Theresa come along. "Brian golfs
every day he's here, and I'd like the company," she'd said, "and besides, what
else are you going to do? You've got to get out of that apartment sometime." Theresa
knew she was right, and after a few days of thinking it over, she finally agreed.
"I'm so glad," Deanna had said with a victorious look on her face. "You're
going to love it there."
Theresa had to admit it was a nice place to stay. The Fisher House was a beautifully
restored captain's house that sat on the edge of a rocky cliff overlooking Cape Cod Bay,
and when she saw it in the distance, she slowed to a jog. Unlike the younger runners who
sped up toward the end of their runs, she preferred to slow down and take it easy. At
thirty-six, she didn't recover as fast as she once had.
As her breathing eased, she thought about how she would spend the rest of her day. She had
brought five books with her for the vacation, books she had been wanting to read for the
last year but had never gotten around to. There just didn't seem to be enough time anymore
--- not with Kevin and his never-ending energy, keeping up with the housework, and
definitely not with all the work constantly piled on her desk. As a syndicated columnist
for the Boston Times, she was under constant deadline pressure to put out three
columns a week. Most of her coworkers thought she had it made --- just type up three
hundred words and be done for the day --- but it wasn't like that at all. To constantly
come up with something original regarding parenting wasn't easy anymore especially if she
wanted to syndicate further. Already her column, "Modern Parenting," went out in
sixty newspapers across the country, though most ran only one or two of her columns in a
given week. And because the syndication offers had started only eighteen months ago and
she was a newcomer to most papers, she couldn't afford even a few "off" days.
Column space in most newspapers was extremely limited, and hundreds of columnists were
vying for those few spots.
Theresa slowed to a walk and finally stopped as a Caspian tern circled overhead. The
humidity was up and she used her forearm to wipe the perspiration from her face. She took
a deep breath, held it for a moment, then exhaled before Iooking out over the water.
Because it was early, the ocean was still murky gray, but that would change once the sun
rose a little higher. It looked enticing. After a moment she took off her shoes and socks,
then walked to the water's edge to let the tiny waves lap over her feet. The water was
refreshing, and she spent a few minutes wading back and forth. She was suddenly glad she
had taken the time to write extra columns over the last few months so that she would be
able to forget work this week. She couldn't remember the last time she didn't have a
computer nearby, or a meeting to attend, or a deadline to meet, and it felt liberating to
be away from her desk for a while. It almost felt as if she were in control of her own
destiny again, as if she were just starting out in the world.
True, there were dozens of things she knew she should be doing at home. The bathroom
should have been wallpapered and updated by now, the nail holes in her walls needed to be
speckled, and the rest of the apartment could use some touch-up painting as well. A couple
of months ago she had bought the wallpaper and some paint, towel rods and door handles,
and a new vanity mirror, as well as all the tools she needed to take care of it, but she
hadn't even opened the boxes yet. It was always something to do next weekend, though the
weekends were often just as busy as her workdays. The items she bought still sat in the
bags she'd brought them home in, behind the vacuum, and every time she opened the closet
door, they seemed to mock her good intentions. Maybe, she thought to herself, when she
returned home . . .
She turned her head and saw a man standing a little way down the beach. He was older than
she, maybe fifty or so, and his face was deeply tanned, as if he lived here year-round. He
didn't appear to be moving --- he simply stood in the water and let it wash over his legs
--- and she noticed his eyes were closed, as if he were enjoying the beauty of the world
without having to watch it. He was wearing faded jeans, rolled up to his knees, and a
comfortable shirt he hadn't bothered to tuck in. As she watched him, she suddenly wished
she were a different kind of person. What would it be like to walk the beaches without
another care in the world? How would it be to come to a quiet spot every day, away from
the hustle and bustle of Boston, just to appreciate what life had to offer?
She stepped out a little farther into the water and mimicked the man, hoping to feel
whatever it was that he was feeling. But when she closed her eyes, the only thing she
could think about was Kevin. Lord knew she wanted to spend more time with him, and she
definitely wanted to be more patient with him when they were together. She wanted to be
able to sit and talk with Kevin, or play Monopoly with him, or simply watch TV with him
without feeling the urge to get up from the couch to do something more important. There
were times when she felt like a fraud when insisting to Kevin that he came first and that
family was the most important thing he'd have.
But the problem was that there was always something to do. Dishes to be washed, bathrooms
to be cleaned, the cat box to be emptied; cars needed tune-ups, laundry needed to be done,
and bills had to be paid. Even though Kevin helped a lot with his chores, he was almost as
busy as she was with school and friends and all his other activities. As it was, magazines
went straight to the garbage unread, letters went unwritten, and sometimes, in moments
like these, she worried that her life was slipping past her.
But how to change all that? "Take life one day at a time," her mother always
said, but her mother didn't have to work outside the home or raise a strong and confident
yet caring son without benefit of a father. She didn't understand the pressures that
Theresa faced on a daily basis. Neither did her younger sister, Janet, who had followed in
the footsteps of their mother. She and her husband had been happily married for almost
eleven years, with three wonderful girls to show for it. Edward wasn't a brilliant man,
but he was honest, worked hard, and provided for his family well enough that Janet didn't
have to work. There were times when Theresa thought she might like a life like that, even
if it meant giving up her career.
But that wasn't possible. Not since David and she divorced. Three years now, four if you
counted the year they were separated. She didn't hate David for what he had done, but her
respect for him had been shattered. Adultery, whether a one-night stand or a long affair,
wasn't something she could live with. Nor did it make her feel better that he never
married the woman he'd been carrying on with for two years. The breach of trust was
irreparable.
David moved back to his home state of California a year after they separated and met
Annette a few months later. His new wife was very religious, and little by little she got
David interested in the church. David, a lifelong agnostic, had always seemed to be hungry
for something more meaningful in his life.
Now he attended church regularly and actually served as a marriage counselor along with
the pastor. What could he possibly say to someone doing the same things he'd done, she
often wondered, and how could he help others if he hadn't been able to control himself?
She didn't know, didn't care, really. She was simply glad that he still took an interest
in his son.
Naturally, once she and David had split up, a lot of her friendships ended as well. Now
that she was no longer part of a couple, she seemed to be out of place at friends'
Christmas parties or backyard barbecues. A few friends remained, though, and she heard
from them on her answering machine, suggesting that they set up a lunch date or come over
for dinner. Occasionally she would go, but usually she made excuses not to. To her, none
of those friendships seemed the way they used to, but then of course they weren't. Things
changed, people changed, and the world went rolling along right outside the window.
Since the divorce there had been only a handful of dates. It wasn't that she was
unattractive. She was, or so she was often told. Her hair was dark brown, cut just above
her shoulders, and straight as spider silk. Her eyes, the feature she was most often
complimented on, were brown with flecks of hazel that caught the light when she was
outside. Since she ran daily, she was fit and didn't look as old as she was. She didn't
feel old, either, but when she looked in the mirror lately, she seemed to see her age
catching up with her. A new wrinkle around the corner of her eye, a gray hair that seemed
to have grown overnight, a vaguely weary look from being constantly on the run.
Her friends thought she was crazy. "You look better now than you did years ago,"
they insisted, and she still noticed a few men eyeing her across the aisle in the
supermarket. But she wasn't, nor ever would be, twenty-two again. Not that she would want
to be, even if she could, unless, she sometimes thought to herself, she could take her
more mature brain back with her. If she didn't, she'd probably get caught up with another
David --- a handsome man who craved the good things in life with the underlying assumption
that he didn't have to play by the rules. But dammit, rules were important, especially the
ones regarding marriage. They were the ones a person was never supposed to break. Her
father and mother didn't break them, her sister and brother-in-law didn't, nor did Deanna
and Brian. Why did he have to? And why, she wondered as she stood in the surf, did her
thoughts always come back to this, even after all this time?
She supposed that it had something to do with the fact that when the divorce papers
finally arrived, she felt as if a little part of her had died. That initial anger she felt
had turned to sadness, and now it had become something else, almost a dullness of sorts.
Even though she was constantly in motion, it seemed as if nothing special ever happened to
her anymore. Each day seemed exactly like the last, and she had trouble differentiating
among them. One time, about a year ago, she sat at her desk for fifteen minutes trying to
remember the last spontaneous thing she'd done. She couldn't think of anything.
The first few months had been hard on her. By then the anger had subsided and she didn't
feel the urge to lash out at David and make him pay for what he had done. All she could do
was feel sorry for herself. Even having Kevin around all the time did nothing to change
the fact that she felt absolutely alone in the world. There was a short time when she
couldn't sleep for more than a few hours a night, and now and then when she was at work,
she would leave her desk and go sit in her car to cry for a while.
Now, with three years gone by, she honestly didn't know if she would ever love someone
again the way she had loved David. When David showed up at her sorority party at the
beginning of her junior year, one look was all it took for her to know she wanted to be
with him. Her young love had seemed so overwhelming, so powerful, then. She would stay
awake thinking about him as she lay in her bed, and when she walked across campus, she
smiled so often that other people would smile back whenever they saw her.
But love like that doesn't last, at least that's what she found out. Over the years, a
different kind of marriage emerged. She and David grew up, and apart. It became hard to
remember the things that had first drawn them to each other. Looking back, Theresa felt
that David became a different person altogether, although she couldn't pinpoint the moment
when it all began to change. But anything can happen when the flame of a relationship goes
out, and for him, it did. A chance meeting at a video store, a conversation that led to
lunch and eventually to hotels throughout the greater Boston area.
The unfair thing about the whole situation was that she still missed him sometimes, or
rather the good parts about him. Being married to David was comfortable, like a bed she'd
slept in for years. She had been used to having another person around, just to talk to or
listen. She had gotten used to waking up to the smell of brewing coffee in the morning,
and she missed having another adult presence in the apartment. She missed a lot of things,
but most of all she missed the intimacy that came from holding and whispering to another
behind closed doors.
Kevin wasn't old enough to understand this yet, and though she loved him deeply, it wasn't
the same kind of love that she wanted right now. Her feeling for Kevin was a mother's
love, probably the deepest, most holy love there is. Even now she liked to go into his
room after he was asleep and sit on his bed just to look at him. Kevin always looked so
peaceful, so beautiful, with his head on the pillow and the covers piled up around him. In
the daytime he seemed to be constantly on the go, but at night his still, sleeping figure
always brought back the feelings she'd had when he was still a baby. Yet even those
wonderful feelings didn't change the fact that once she left his room, she would go
downstairs and have a glass of wine with only Harvey the cat to keep her company.
She still dreamed about falling in love with someone, of having someone take her in his
arms and make her feel she was the only one who mattered. But it was hard, if not
impossible, to meet someone decent these days. Most of the men she knew in their thirties
were already married, and the ones that were divorced seemed to be looking for someone
younger whom they could somehow mold into exactly what they wanted. That left older men,
and even though she thought she could fall in love with someone older, she had her son to
worry about. She wanted a man who would treat Kevin the way he should be treated, not
simply as the unwanted by-product of someone he desired. But the reality was that older
men usually had older children; few welcomed the trials of raising an adolescent male in
the I990s. "I've already done my job," a date had once informed her curtly. That
had been the end of that relationship.
She admitted that she also missed the physical intimacy that came from loving and trusting
and holding someone else. She hadn't been with a man since she and David divorced. There
had been opportunities, of course --- finding someone to sleep with was never difficult
for an attractive woman --- but that simply wasn't her style. She hadn't been raised that
way and didn't intend to change now. Sex was too important, too special, to be shared with
just anyone. In fact, she had slept with only two men in her life --- David, of course,
and Chris, the first real boyfriend she'd ever had. She didn't want to add to the list
simply for the sake of a few minutes of pleasure.
So now, vacationing at Cape Cod, alone in the world and without a man anywhere in the
foreseeable future, she wanted to do some things this week just for herself. Read some
books, put her feet up, and have a glass of wine without the TV flickering in the
background. Write some letters to friends she hadn't heard from in a while. Sleep late,
eat too much, and jog in the mornings, before everyone got there to spoil it. She wanted
to experience freedom again, if only for a short time.
She also wanted to shop this week. Not at JCPenney or Sears or places that advertised Nike
shoes and Chicago Bulls T-shirts, but at little trinket stores that Kevin found boring.
She wanted to try on some new dresses and buy a couple that flattered her figure, just to
make her feel she was still alive and vibrant. Maybe she would even get her hair done. She
hadn't had a new style in years, and she was tired of looking the same every day. And if a
nice guy happened to ask her out this week, maybe she'd go, just to have an excuse to wear
the new things she bought.
With a somewhat renewed sense of optimism, she looked to see if the man with the rolled-up
jeans was still there, but he had gone as quietly as he had come. And she was ready to go
as well. Her legs had stiffened in the cool water, and sitting down to put on her shoes
was a little more difficult than she expected. Since she didn't have a towel, she
hesitated for a moment before putting on her socks, then decided she didn't have to. She
was on vacation at the beach. No need for shoes or socks.
She carried them with her as she started toward the house. She walked dose to the water's
edge and saw a large rock half buried in the sand, a few inches from a spot where the
early morning tide had reached its highest point. Strange, she thought to herself, it
seemed out of place here.
As she approached, she noticed something different about the way it looked. It was smooth
and long, for one thing, and as she drew nearer she realized it wasn't a rock at all. It
was a bottle, probably discarded by a careless tourist or one of the local teens who liked
to come here at night. She looked over her shoulder and saw a garbage can chained to the
lifeguard tower and decided to do her good deed for the day. When she reached it, however,
she was surprised to see that it was corked. She picked it up, holding it into better
light, and saw a note inside wrapped with yarn, standing on its end.
For a second she felt her heart quicken as another memory came back to her. When she was
eight years old and vacationing in Florida with her parents, she and another girl had once
sent a letter via the sea, but she'd never received a reply. The letter was simple, a
child's letter, but when she returned home, she remembered racing to the mailbox for weeks
afterward, hoping that someone had found it and sent a letter to her from where the bottle
washed up. When nothing ever came, disappointment set in, the memory fading gradually
until it became nothing at all. But now it all came back to her. Who had been with her
that day? A girl about her age . . . Tracy? . . . no . . . Stacey? . . . yes, Stacey!
Stacey was her name! She had blond hair . . . she was staying with her grandparents for
the summer. . . and. . . and. . . and the memory stopped there, with nothing else coming
no matter how hard she tried.
She began to pull at the cork, almost expecting it to be the same bottle she had sent,
although she knew that couldn't be. It was probably from another child, though, and if it
requested a reply, she was going to send it. Maybe along with a small gift from the Cape
and a postcard as well.
The cork was wedged in tightly, and her fingers slipped as she tried to open it. She
couldn't get a very good grip. She dug her short fingernails into the exposed cork and
twisted the bottle slowly. Nothing. She switched hands and tried again. Tightening her
grip, she put the bottle between her legs for more leverage, and just as she was about to
give up, the cork moved a little. Suddenly renewed, she changed back to her original hands
. . . squeezed . . . twisting the bottle slowly . . . more cork . . . and suddenly it
loosened and the remaining portion slipped out easily.
She tipped the bottle upside-down and was surprised when the note dropped to the sand by
her feet almost immediately. When she leaned over to pick it up, she noticed it was
tightly bound, which was why it slid out so easily.
She untied the yarn carefully, and the first thing that struck her as she unrolled the
message was the paper. This was no child's stationery. It was expensive paper, thick and
sturdy, with a silhouette of a sailing ship embossed in the upper right hand corner. And
the paper itself was crinkled, aged looking, almost as if it had been in the water for a
hundred years.
She caught herself holding her breath. Maybe it was old. It could be --- there were
stories about bottles washing up after a hundred years at sea, so that could be the case
now. Maybe she had a real artifact here. But as she scrutinized the writing itself, she
saw that she was mistaken. There was a date on the upper left corner of the paper.
July 22, 1997.
A little more than three weeks ago.
Three weeks? That's all?
She looked a little further. The message was long --- it covered the front and back sides
of the paper --- and it didn't seem to request any reply of sorts. A quick glance showed
no address or phone number anywhere, but she supposed it could have been written into the
letter itself.
She felt a twinge of curiosity as she held the message in front of her, and it was then,
in the rising sunlight of a hot New England day, that she first read the letter that would
change her life forever.
July 22, 1997
My Dearest Catherine,
I miss you my darling as I always do, but today is especially hard because the ocean has
been singing to me, and the song is that of our life together. I cam almost feel you
beside me as I write this letter, and I can smell the scent of wildflowers that always
reminds me of you. But at this moment, these things give me no pleasure. Your visits have
been coming less often, and I feel sometimes as if the greatest part of who I am is slowly
slipping away.
I am trying, though. At night when I am alone, I call for you, and whenever my ache seems
to be the greatest, you still seem to find a may to return to me. Last night, in my
dreams, I saw you on the pier near Wrightsville Beach. The wind was blowing through your
hair, and your eyes held the fading sun light. I am struck as I see you leaning against
the rail. You are beautiful, I think I see you, a vision that I can never find in anyone
else. I slowly begin to walk toward you, and when you finally turn to me, I notice that
others have been watching you as well. "Do you know her?" they ask me in jealous
whispers, and as you smile at me, I simply answer back with the truth. "Better than
my own heart."
I stop when I reach you and take you in my arms. I long for this moment more than any
other. It is what I live for, and when you return my embrace, I give myself over to this
moment, at peace once again.
I raise my head and gently touch your cheek and you tilt your head and close your eyes. My
hands are hard and your skin is soft, and I wonder for a moment if you'll pull back, but
of course you don't. You never have, and it is at times like this that I know what my
purpose is in life.
I am here to love you, to hold you in my arms, to protect you. I am here to learn from you
and to receive your love in return. I am here because there is no other place to be.
But then, as always, the mist starts to form as we stand close to one another. It is a
distant fog that rises from the horizon, and I find that I grow fearful as it approaches.
It slowly creeps in, enveloping the world around us, fencing us in as if to prevent
escape. Like a rolling cloud, it blankets everything, closing, until there is nothing left
but the two of us.
I feel my throat begin to close and my eyes well-up with tears because I know it is time
for you to go. The look you give me at that moment haunts me. I feel your sadness and my
own loneliness, and the ache in my heart that had been silent for only a short time grows
stronger as you release me. And then you spread your arms and step back into the fog
because it is your place and not mine. I long to go with you, but your only response is to
shake your head because we both know that is impossible.
And I watch with breaking heart as you slowly fade away. I find myself straining to
remember everything about this moment, everything about you. But soon, always too soon,
your image vanishes and the fog rolls back to its faraway place and I am alone on the pier
and I do not care what others think as I bow my head and cry and cry and cry.
Garrett
Excerpted from MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE © Copyright 1998 by Nicholas Sparks. Reprinted with permission by Warner Vision. All rights reserved.
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