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June 29, 2012

Thank You, Nora

While watching an early morning news show on Wednesday morning, I learned some very sad news. Screenwriter/director/author --- and all-around great lady --- Nora Ephron had passed away. No simple Facebook status or 140-character tweet could ever effectively convey her influence or talent. How subdued the world seems now that she’s gone. It’s like the light in the room just got slightly dimmer.  

We’re seeing an outpouring of tributes for Ephron in the wake of her death (deservedly so), and most reference the famous Katz’s Deli scene in When Harry Met Sally as trademark Ephron. That moment is certainly iconic and hilarious, but nowhere near my top five favorite moments from that classic film. That’s how rich the movie is. There are so many! I’ve always had a fondness for the “Don’t F*ck with Mr. Zero” story, as told by Billy Crystal as he tells Bruno Kirby of his wife’s departure while watching a football game, replete with doing the wave. And it bears mentioning that the late, great Bruno Kirby has always been and will always be known to me as “Baby Fishmouth,” courtesy of Ephron’s genius.

It’s hard to remember anything B.N. (Before Nora). Her career as a journalist and then magazine columnist led to her career in the movies. It’s a testament to her talent and bravery that every field she attempted, she succeeded in. And she made it all look easy. I started to think of how much her work has infused my life. Her words are woven into my vernacular. When I’ve come from dealing with someone or something distasteful, I’ll mention the need to take “a Silkwood shower.” (Remember when they rubbed poor Meryl Streep raw in that?)

And it’s not just me. When platform shoes made an unfortunate but thankfully brief comeback in the early 1990s, my brother would channel Steve Martin’s character from My Blue Heaven and say, “Those shoes are tragic!” In college, I remember reading about a piece of advice given to a young Ephron from her screenwriter mother:  “Darling, everything is copy!” I often think of these words of wisdom when something horrible or irritating happens. It’s hard to imagine a person being as funny, as smart, and as talented as Ephron was, and still come off as the girl next door. To come out of the gate with Silkwood being your first script (co-written with Alice Arlen) was an incredible herald to Hollywood that a new voice was upon us and we were all the better for listening.

I had the honor of reviewing her two most recent essay collections, I FEEL BAD ABOUT MY NECK and I REMEMBER NOTHING for Bookreporter.com. I always loved her movies, but I think I loved her short pieces and her novels just as much. Her essays were sharp, smart and had her unique voice. I admired her ability to express her love of a good book in a way so sweet and succinct: “Reading is everything. Reading makes me feel like I've accomplished something, learned something, become a better person." And that’s exactly what I took away from reading her. It was like an intimate conversation with a best friend. And she discussed everything from the ridiculous, such as her friend’s obsession with handbags (Ephron’s bag? A simple, functional MetroCard bag), to the sublime, recreating her days as a cub reporter, or exposing the very private pain of her crumbling marriage in HEARTBURN. My favorite quote about marriage comes from that novel: “I married him against all evidence. I married him believing that marriage doesn’t work, that love dies, that passion fades, and in so doing I became the kind of romantic only a cynic is truly capable of being.”

How could somebody be so smart, witty and urbane, and crystallize a thought so perfectly? She made romantics of us all --- even the most cynical of us, those of us who thought we knew better. And that was truly the essence of Ephron --- a cynic with softened edges who still holds out a little bit of hope, someone who rejoices in the simple pleasures. How could we resist? In this age of reality TV catfights and dumbed-down media everywhere you turn, I am so grateful I was lucky enough to live in a world with Nora Ephron in it.